Tomato Babies

My mother lived at the new house after we moved for three years before she died. In those three years, there was one season when we went to the store and bought plants. We planted azaleas and gladiolus in the front and tomatoes in the backyard. 

I don't actually remembered what sparked this choice to go purchase plants. I don't remember my mother ever taking care of plants except a pothos plant she'd had since my brother was born. But I remember planting all of these plants. We were just playing really. Nothing actually grew well. The azalea did okay for a few years but didn't thrive. The gladiolus bloomed that first year and never again. 

The tomatoes? Oh the tomatoes...now these I remember vividly.

We planted the tomatoes next to the fence facing south. They received a decent amount of sunlight, and it really wasn't a bad place to tuck some tomato plants and still stay out of the way of the rest of the yard. 

I was in charge of taking care of all the plants. I remember coming home from school in the afternoon everyday and I'd go outside and fill up watering jugs, open the front gate and water the azaleas and the gladiolus in the front. Then I'd go back into the backyard and swap my watering jug for the hose. I'd stretch the hose out and wind it around the backyard to where the tomatoes were. I'd stand there watering the tomatoes and watch water drip off their foliage. 

Then I'd proceed to water the rest of the grass in the backyard and make my way back toward the spigot to turn off the water once I'd sprayed the whole backyard. I would reel the hose and wind it back onto the hose stand nearly before going back inside the house. I enjoyed watering these plants after school. It was fun. I was alone. It was therapeutic.

One afternoon I was poking around the garage and I found my dad's fertilizer. Lawn fertilizer, although I didn't know the difference. Being about 11-12, I understood that fertilizer helped plants grow faster. I also knew I needed to wear gloves handling them as it is a chemical. But I did not know about the correct amount of fertilizer to apply. I did not know that too much fertilizer would turn into poison. I also didn't know that lawn fertilizer should not be applied to garden edibles, but let's not forget how old I was. 

I took small handfuls of the fertilizer and placed them at the base of each tomato plant. Then, I watered it in. We had six tomato plants to start with. Four of them died. The other two sprouted up wildly and became large, untamed tomato plants. I thought it was cool. This tiny little stem of a plant became this large entanglement of stems and leaves and fruit buds. I didn't understand or know the need for a tomato cage or support at the time. Neither did my mother, so we didn't have one. They just....grew. 

I never ate a single tomato off of those tomato plants. It's probably better I didn't anyway because I used lawn fertilizer on a tomato plant. Oops. But I did pick one tomato. I picked it when it was still mostly green and a little red. I picked it because the animals were getting to them and if I wanted to pick a fruit and show myself what I grew, I'd have to get it before it was ripe.  Otherwise, an insect or an invasive mammal would beat me to it. We didn't know to protect the fruits. 

The tomatoes we once grew in my dad's backyard have been long gone. After I realized we weren't going to be eating any tomatoes that year, I cared for it less. Also, the hot summer made it unenjoyable to stand outside and continue watering. Interests changed. Most likely it died in the first frost that winter and didn't return after. Life got busy. 

Now, I grow my own plants. I do not sprinkle lawn fertilizer on my edibles. I support my plants with stakes and cages when needed. I have a soil moisture meter to prevent over and under watering. I pick off bugs on leaves by hand if I see them. This is my third year involved in growing. The first was research and learning from my neighbor who's a master gardener. She shared so many of the fruits of her labor with me. I saved seeds, I researched plants, I studied sun patterns around our house, and I started planning. The second, I tried germinating seeds I'd saved. That was quite an adventure. But late summer, I actually had some harvest. Although not nearly as large or tasty as grocery store peppers, it was satisfying to eat the fruit of my own labor. 

This year, I'm growing peppers from seeds I've saved over the years. I'm also growing some Thai basil from seeds I purchased last year but couldn't get to germinate. The seeds are still good - it was user error why no basil sprouted last year. I managed to get some Genovese basil seeds, saved from my neighbor, to germinate as well. 

But you know what my favorite is? My tomatoes. 

I saw this tomato plant at Costco and could not resist. It was the last tomato plant they had.
The tallest part of the stem had broken off due to mishandling probably, but I knew I could help
with the right care. It has grown beautifully. 

My cherry tomatoes. Cute and sweet, hopefully just like the fruit.

Yes, tomatoes are "easy to grow." Yes, tomatoes grow rather quickly given the right growing conditions. Yes, we eat and cook with a good number of tomatoes. But that's not what makes growing them special. My tomatoes are special because they resurfaced this memory for me after all these years. And it wasn't even that my mother gardened with me and we have memories growing tomatoes together. We didn't. 

But she was the one who said, "Let's grow some tomato plants."

This is 19. 

Part Two: Foresight

This is part two of a two part series. To read part one. please catch up here. 

Years passed. The Small Table was still outside on the patio. By this time, his wood was stripped on the most exposed side. The once shiny, polished finish had turned black in areas. Dust and pollen accumulated on top. The Small Table was losing hope. He had waited through many changing seasons, and still, nobody came for him. 

One day, Foresight entered this house. Foresight surveyed the area. Foresight looked inside the pantry. Foresight looked in the refrigerator. Foresight looked in the freezer. There would be a time and place for dealing with these areas. By chance, Foresight opened the blinds to the patio door and stumbled upon The Small Table. 

Foresight asked The Follower if The Small Table was being used. The Follower did not use him. There was no need to ask The Fool as that is why The Small Table was rejected in the first place. Foresight cleaned, wiped, disassembled, and transported The Small Table away.

The Small Table was elated. He was so happy to be found. He was so glad to be rescued from the patio. He was ready for his makeover.

Foresight had a vision of the beauty which could be revealed from The Small Table. There would be a new coat of paint. Choosing the color would be slightly trickier. Foresight debated white. Gray. Navy. Even a bright shade of teal was considered. But in the end, Foresight made the decision to leave the top natural and stain it. The legs would be painted white to create an elegant, modern look. 

It's so nice to have a covered workspace in the garage, even with two cars inside...😊

Of course, the actual transformation process is never easy. The Small Table had to endure a generous layer of sanding to remove all the damage and ensure an even coat of new stain and paint. On went a generous coat of stain as well as three layers of poly to protect the surface. The Small Table would be protected and taken care of. 

The first coat of primer never looks like much, but you have to trust the process.

Each of the legs was meticulously primed and painted white with a satin finish. You would never have guessed what The Small Table had been through from seeing it now. 

The Small Table hopes to be able to listen to children laughing. The sounds of voices in conversation. He wants to be colored on, be painted on. He wants to be the surface to rest bowls of freshly cooked meals. He wants to soak in the smells of various cuisines. He wants to support the pages of a book or the paper in a notebook as someone studies, completes homework, or writes for fun. Yes, he wants to be used and worn over time in these ways. Yes, he wants his surface to be occasionally scratched or marked. 

These ways, however destructive they can be, are much better than being left outside to the mercy of the weather. These ways, however destructive they can be, are much better than suffocating under a pile of things. These ways, however destructive they can be, are much better than being rejected. 

Because these are the ways in which love and purpose happen. And Foresight was able to see it. 

Part One: The Fool and the Follower

The Follower lived in a beautiful house with not so beautiful things. There were not many and the house felt sparse, but The Follower didn't care. They worked, they sufficed , and there were no complaints. One day, The Fool entered this beautiful house. The Fool took a look around and considered. This house was not beautiful enough. It needed more beautiful things. 

So The Fool went shopping and purchased items. Beautiful items. New items. And in they started. At first, it was different. Different was not something The Follower was used to. The Follower was discontent and voiced this discontentment. The Fool didn't listen. In came more beautiful things. Beautiful things became just things. The Follower slowly lost a voice, lost the discontentment, and let it happen. 

Slowly, the house of not so beautiful things that was sparsely filled became the house of overcrowded beautiful things. Items which individually could have been decorative, beautiful, lovely, now became a plethora of things, overcrowding countertops. Storage was needed to store the excess items. Beautiful things became forgotten because they were piled on top of each other. You couldn't even identify one item at a time. It was all so overwhelming to look at. 

The beautiful things all together became not so beautiful. And slowly, this once beautiful house with not so beautiful things became an ugly house with ugly things. But The Fool did not notice how ugly the things were becoming. The Fool wanted more and more. In everything came. An item here. An item there. Slowly, steadily. And The Follower did not say a word. 

In the midst of this infiltration, The Fool became discontent with a table. This table was too small for The Fool. It wasn't large enough to hold all the things The Fool wanted to display. Display is an understatement. The Fool asked for a Larger Table and The Follower obliged. 

Now The Small Table was one of the few "beautiful" items in the once beautiful house. It was a table of solid wood, kept in very good condition for its age. But The Fool didn't want it. And The Follower didn't see it. In barged the larger table. Next to a wooden shelf. Next to a baker's rack blocking a wall of windows. Next to a floor filled with wastebaskets, four on the floor within a 25 foot distance. The empty space around what used to be the smaller table lessened. The space felt even more cramped and uncomfortable. 

The Small Table was unwanted. The Follower did not know what to do with it. The Fool didn't want it. There was no space in other rooms for the smaller table to live. So you know what happened? The Small Table was relegated to the back patio. To The Fool and The Follower, it was problem solved. They didn't want it, they didn't see it.

The Small Table was now exposed to the elements. He saw the hot sun of summer and the cold snow and ice of winter. He felt the strong winds brush against his surface. A wasp made a home underneath an eave. Dust and pollen blew around him, settling on top. The Small Table stayed like this for years and years. But you know what? He was happier outside exposed to the elements than he was inside. Because inside the once beautiful house was suffocating. Inside the once beautiful house, he went unnoticed under and next to the piles and piles of things. 

Outside, he was in plain sight. Yes, he was getting weathered by the elements, but he was visible. And the smaller table made a vow to persevere until someone noticed his beauty. 

Years later, Foresight came upon this house....

Part Two

Single Parenting Week

Since we've had kids, my husband has had to leave for work trips four times. The first time was when my daughter was six weeks old. That was an absolute nightmare and I was very pissed about that trip. The second time was when my daughter was 22 months old and I was 30 weeks pregnant. After that trip, I jokingly hoped he wouldn't have to travel for the next 2+ years. My wish came true!....at the expense of Covid. 

The first trip he took after Covid was last summer. I had a four year old and a two year old. I don't remember it being too bad, but I also don't remember what happened. He took another trip last week and I was left with a five year old and a three year old. We had LOTS of fun when Daddy was gone. There were definitely multiple moments where I wanted to scream at them and make them disappear temporarily, but overall, it was a really fun week with my kids. 

I took the week off work, but honestly, I traded it for more work and no pay. My husband did keep up his end of the bargain of always buying me a gift when he goes out of town and leaves me with the kids. I was impressed by his thoughtfulness and how useful this gift was.

He got me (us) fridge magnet letters! They're so fun. We write each other messages and even label the dishes for the week. It's like an alternative to our dry erase board except more hands-on.

My daughter has also taken on to creating her own words and asking me to pronounce them. 

This one was not as impressive as the one she made last night. I do like dmydym though. If only that were a real word...

Needless to say, it was a relief to have him back on Friday after a solid 96 hours by myself. 

I actually kind of miss those blog quizzes we used to put up as teenagers on our xanga and myspace 20+ years ago for our friends to fill out and see who knew us best. I wanted to bring one back for fun but actually offer a reward for the person with the most correct answers. So I made a quiz using a Google Form based off of my week as a single parent. The person with the most correct answers will receive a gift card of their choice from me. 

I actually don't even know if my husband knows all the answers to this quiz. But I promise you if his is the top winner, it won't count :) 

I'm accepting quiz entries until 12:00AM Friday April 14th, 2023. 

Maybe this will be a new tradition I start when my husband goes out of town for work. We'll see. 😄

Branches and Roots

Last year was arguably one of the hardest years of my life. I experienced things I never thought I would. I testified in court. I wrote letters to the county jail. I went to a prison to visit an inmate. Yeah, the city in Texas that's famous for their penitentiary? Most people just drive down 45 and pass the wire fence and bright lights. That's not even where the actual prison is. The actual prison is in the middle of downtown Huntsville. And I've been there. 

Why did I do all this? Because I know without a doubt this person is innocent of the crime. I can't directly change the circumstance, but I can do my part in being a friend, and in loving the people who are affected.

When this happened, I had a vision to commission an artwork. In some ways, I wanted the artwork to be commemorative. In other ways, I wanted it to be a beautiful piece of art for people to find their own story. But I wanted a very specific image. I wanted to see trees intertwined in the branches to where you could not see where one tree ended and the second tree began. But I wanted the focus to be on the intertwined-ness of the trees. No fancy leaves or flowers. I wanted to see the branches touch each other and merge into one. 

I explained this vision to my friend who happens to be an artist. I asked if she could make it happen. She showed me some drafts and we molded this idea of mine into reality. She was the one who actually told me that trees begin to share roots over time as they grow and share each other's space. 

Somewhere from the time this vision of mine was born, my children and I went to the library and found this book: Apple and Magnolia. 

I have a little secret. I've always judged books by their covers. I love seeing beautiful covers. It makes me more excited and generally more happy to open the book and want to read it. This children's book drew me in. I love the way the trees are illustrated with a youthful, fluffy look. I love that the title of the book is written in rainbow letters. And the thin piece of yarn twirled through the two trees gives it a dainty elegance. I had no idea what the book was about, I just saw the cover and wanted to check it out.

I took it home and read it. I can't remember if the first time I read it was with my children or if I just read it myself. Sometimes I do that...just read the books I check out for my children by myself. This book illustrated the idea I had for the intertwined trees perfectly. I don't want to spoil the book as it's a really special story, but it involves the idea of trees helping each other grow. 

When someone helps us, we automatically think, we need to repay the person who helped us. But what if that person is not in need of help? Why not redirect the help we want to give to someone else who needs it? I think this idea should be more widespread. Instead of limiting the assistance to a circular loop, why not spread it out further? 

I was and still am very impressed with the way my commission turned out. The way she twisted the fabric in the branches as she stitched added a lovely texture to the piece. She even outlined the shadows of the tree roots and how they merge with the trees beside them. I'm so glad she's moved closer and I was able to visit her last Christmas. You can check out the rest of her work at her site. 

This year has proven no easier than last year. I still feel spread thin most weeks. But there's a strange joy in knowing I am linking my branches and growing my roots into other trees. It's how we grow stronger.

Living the Dream

It's hard to imagine we've almost been in our house for eight years. That's twice as long as the previous owners. We bought our first house as newlyweds, began renovating it, and have since brought home two babies. Six months after we bought the house, we finished painting all the kitchen cabinets and drawers and were able to park our cars back in.

At the time, it only took 1.5 hours to clean the garage and pull both of our cars back in. Our overhead storage rack was completely empty and we didn't own nearly as many tools, gardening equipment, our chest freezer, a bike trailer, or eight total bicycles (children's + adult's). I was impressed then and vowed to always keep our garage clean enough to be able to pull two cars into it. 

Nearly eight years later, I've kept that vow, and done an even better job than I thought was possible. What's better than parking two cars in the garage? Parking THREE cars in the garage! Now FYI we have two-car garage door. So the opening is only big enough to park two cars. So....how did we do this? 

I blogged about the first part of this project last fall. You can read about my Garage Saga series here to catch up if you didn't already read it. 

Yesterday, the rest of the dream was completed. After about a year of research, we finally pulled the trigger and purchased the car lift. Originally, it was going to be installed in February, but we conveniently received a notice from the city a week after we made arrangements that they would be doing alley construction for the next month. We called the installer and requested a later install date. 

In the end, the city construction finished the weekend before the original install date was scheduled. But the rescheduling worked out anyway because we needed the extra time to clean out the garage to make sure the lift fit.

Whenever I told people we were getting a lift, they'd get confused because nobody really knows what a car lift actually looks like. This is what a car lift looks like. It's basically a mechanical elevator for a car. 

The same two cars from eight years ago, now stacked on top of each other. 

No, this is not at a mechanic shop.
Our two car garage is now a three car garage! 

I've upped my own antes now. Must keep the garage clean enough to always park three cars in it now. 😂 I didn't think I'd care for the car lift as much as my husband, but after seeing it installed with our cars all neatly parked inside our garage, I really, really love it. 

Also as a side joke, I bought myself a Hotwheel. We were picking out cars for my son for his birthday, and I decided to get one I liked, too. I picked it because I liked the color and it looked pretty chic. 

When I got home, I decided to Google this car to see how much it would cost in real life. $1.695M you guys. I never thought I was a car person, but man, I sure know how to pick a car 😝. I didn't even notice it doesn't have a windshield until I read the description on the website: created to deliver nothing but the purest driving experience. For the rest of us realists, this translates to: you will feel all the wind in your face and possibly eat a bug or two when driving. 

Don't think I'll be getting this car in real life anytime soon...but it's a pretty little model to look at. 😁

The Hare's Real Problem

One of my teaching analogies I use is retelling the story of the tortoise and the hare. I don't need to retell the story because by the time my students are old enough to understand this analogy, they know the story. When I ask my students what the purpose of this story is, they typically respond with, "slow and steady wins the race."

And that's what we were taught growing up. However, over the years, I've begun to question this proverb. Is it true that if you work slowly and steadily, you will eventually finish your project or reach your goal? Yes, absolutely. Progress, however slow, is still progress. But this proverb fails to take into account some other facts of the story.

The hare is faster than the tortoise. That was, is, and always will be a fact. By sheer ability, the hare is faster. The hare was created that way, and he is faster than a tortoise. In most retellings of the story, the hare gets a great lead in the beginning because of how fast he is. He looks behind him and notices the tortoise is nowhere to be seen. He is obviously ahead of the tortoise and has an easy lead. 

Then, the story goes to say the hare takes a nap and falls asleep under the tree. Most renditions of the story paint the picture that the hare taking a nap means he is lazy and not hard-working. This is where the tortoise keeps going at his slow pace, overtakes the hare, and wins the race.

bye bye, hare

Is the hare actually lazy though? I'm sure it was work for the hare to reach where he was along the race path when he decided to take a nap under the tree. Even if it may have been "easy" for him, it took energy and effort to get that far in the race. Could he have made the decision to rest a while and take a nap? Sure. Was he in the lead and ahead? Yes. Therefore, you cannot attribute the hare's decision to take a nap as being lazy.

You know where the hare went wrong? His nap was too long! He fell asleep for so long that the tortoise was able to catch up and slowly amble to the finish line. Although let's be honest, however slow the tortoise was moving, in reference to his ability, it wasn't ambling. He was probably moving at his fastest pace possible.

Taking a break is not a bad thing. Relaxing is not wrong. Sometimes, loafing is necessary. But the problem is, so many of us do not know when to resume. Could the hare have just run the race, finished it, and won without stopping in the middle? Yes. Could the hare have still won the race with a shorter nap in the middle? I believe so, yes. But sadly, the hare did not win the race when he took a nap, lost track of time, and did not finish the race in time. 

I don't think we should be told to be like the tortoise. Sometimes, for things we struggle with, we do need to be like the tortoise and trudge on through it, even if it's something we don't like. But I also think we should learn a lot from the hare. Take advantage of your big leads when you have one. Use your talents and gifts in your favor. And don't be afraid to take breaks or rest when you want to. 

But, you must know when to resume.